February 22, 2024

There is a busy & congested road in front of my house. I use this road sometimes driving my car & sometimes walking on foot. Whenever I am driving my car & in a hurry (which is the case mostly), I think,” why so many people are walking on this road? Can’t these people sit at home in place of crawling/crowding here? If someone comes in front of my car suddenly, I abuse him/her with the best of my vocabulary learnt. This abuse is mostly silent in my mind, which only I can hear, but sometimes, it comes out loud & clear.

But whenever I am walking on the same road, my stream of thoughts flows in opposite direction. “why these people driving vehicles have no patience at all? What is the hurry? Is world going to an end?” when some vehicle touches me or some other pedestrian, the abuses in the mind starts triggering.

Lifer is also like that. Our views changes according to our role/affiliation, which can change any moment. Sometime we are with government & sometimes with opposition. Sometimes we are client & sometime selling our ideas/products. Sometimes we are employee & sometimes boss. Sometime we are parent & some other time we become children. Whatever role we are playing, we tend to prove the opposite party wrong with our logic, so that our stand may look ‘right’. But is it required?

A bias to the role we are playing at a particular moment is natural. But getting attached to it & becoming too bias becomes a hindrance in the flow of life. ‘Positional bias to own position/role in society’ is a sin committed unknowingly most often.

You may ask, “why should I bother about it at all?” Whenever you are the decision maker and your decisions affect others, this aspect becomes important and you shall pay attention to it. If you are the CEO or in top management, you may have the luxury of calling for a presentation from your staff and thus receiving all inputs before taking a balanced decision/policy making. But ordinary people do not get this luxury & often fall prey to this syndrome of self-bias. The time for taking too many decisions in daily lives and availability of all inputs is limited for an ordinary person like me & you (someone like me who has written this article & someone like you who is reading it).

Having an unbiased view in critical/important ‘decision making’ is the key to a happy life, not at that moment, but for the time to come also. This skill-set is not very difficult to develop & many meditation techniques are available for this.

To get rid of this limitation one such practice suggested here. Just get some uninterrupted time/place, come to a relaxed positioned and just become witness to your thought-process. Let these come, go and pass. Don’t categorise into good or bad. The churning movement of thoughts will stabilize and ultimately it will lead to a ‘void situation’ if we do this ritual. This can be done on daily basis for few minutes initially. Repeated practice will help in developing a balanced attitude. When we witness ourself acting in the drama of life with unbiased attitude, we don’t have to prove others wrong to prove ourself right. The decisions taken with this attitude are perfect blend of logic & feelings and also according to our taste & comfort level.